Four new releases coming this week, and most of them won’t put a dent in the box office thanks to Furious 7.
In my own particular order:
After six years of keeping our malls safe, Paul Blart (Kevin James) has earned a well-deserved vacation. He heads to Vegas with his teenage daughter before she heads off to college. But safety never takes a holiday and when duty calls, Blart answers.
Call me a fool, but I hold a soft spot in my heart for the first Paul Blart: Mall Cop. I didn’t see it in the theaters, but there is something about a mustached fat man on a Segway just trying to do his job that hits me right in the feels. (My wife hates “the feels”, so this is just to piss her off. 🙂 ) Am I expecting much from this film? Not really, but if it makes me laugh a few times, then I think it will be a win for me.
While video chatting one night, six high school friends receive a Skype message from a classmate who killed herself exactly one year ago. At first they think it’s a prank, but when the girl starts revealing the friends’ darkest secrets, they realize they are dealing with something out of this world, something that wants them dead. Told entirely from a young girl’s computer desktop, CYBERNATURAL redefines ‘found footage’ for a new generation of teens.
This is a movie that first came out in limited release last year under the title CYBERNATURAL, and is finally getting its wide release. I’m down for a scary movie, and this seems to fit the bill. It looks to be a cross of I Know What You Did Last Summer and The Blair Witch Project, but it is something I will probably see with my wife.
Based on the first of a trilogy by Tom Rob Smith and set in the Stalin era of the Soviet Union. The plot is about an idealistic pro-Stalin security officer who decides to investigate a series of child murders in a country where supposedly this sort of crime doesn’t exist. The state would not hear of the existence of a child murderer let alone a serial killer. He gets demoted and exiled but decides, with just the help of his wife, to continue pursuing the case.
With Gary Oldman, Joel Kinnaman, and Tom Hardy in this movie, you would think it would be something to really get me to go see it, but from the trailer, I have no interest in seeing this movie. I don’t know if it is the setting, or what, but i my interest is at zero.
Monkey Kingdom
A nature documentary that follows a newborn monkey and its mother as they struggle to survive within the competitive social hierarchy of the Temple Troop, a dynamic group of monkeys who live in ancient ruins found deep in the storied jungles of South Asia.
It’s a movie about monkey. Cute, adorable, furry little monkeys. What’s not to like about it? Honestly, this looks like a great movie alternative to take the little ones to, especially if they have already seen Home. We might be seeing this one with our little one if the time permits, but I don’t expect it to spend a lot of time in the theaters.
And there you have it folks. Is there a particular movie you want to see out of this list?
My Stupid Movie Reviews 